Bye Bhutan!

From Robert the Telegraphic Gila Monster

Hey folks! Here I am, the only gila monster in Bangkok International Airport, concealed in the carry-on of my human buddy, Doug, using his one-hour free wi fi to give my final report on this journey. What a journey it was!

My original purpose was to convey greetings from the god of Funeral Peak in Death Valley, InsertHere, to his cousin, Tab B, in the Bhutanese Himalayas (keep reading for more on the unusual names), but it turned out they didn't have much to say to each other beyond a conventional, "Hello." My real new friend is a distant relative of my kind, a tokay gecko, whom I met in the mountains near the famed Tiger's Nest monastery. His name is...I'll try to spell it in English letters: Ke-ke-ack-a-grrrrp. He explained to me that the term "tokay" is an onomatopoetic representation of its mating call. We had a congenial discussion of the contrast between us, as my kind doesn't have a mating call; we go by smell. I secrete a pheromone that suggests to female gila monsters that a needy male is near, while meanwhile, if I'm lucky, I detect a pheromone suggesting that a female finds my message interesting. This is the wonder of travel: Meeting other cultures and discovering how for all our differences, we aren't so different after all!

The one-hour free wi fi is closing.

All the best, your world traveling reptile, Robert the Telepathic Gila Monster.